RCA DD The Printer (Composer)

Several months ago, during a therapy session, my therapist asked me why I was still afraid of ghosts as an adult, and what I was afraid of specifically. At the time, I didn’t have an answer, but as I thought more about it, a memory resurfaced. It was a night when I was around 7-8 years old and was left home alone while my parents went out. Our house was an old three-story building, and I was too scared to venture upstairs or downstairs, so stayed in a room on the first floor, anxiously scanning every corner of the room. I was hiding under my desk when suddenly the old printer in the room turned on by itself, and I felt like a ghost had entered my room and was dancing in front of me, scaring me out of my wits. It was surprising to me that, when talking about parents with a classmate three months later, this memory came back to me again. It made me curious about why, when discussing parents, I could recall a childhood memory related to my fear of ghosts. I was intrigued and decided to dig deeper and this is where this project starts. The title of this project is “The Printer”, because in this story “the printer” became the source of the fear and also makes the fear visible. When we think about childhood traumas, we typically associate it with children who have experienced domestic violence or those who have been deeply loved by their parents. However, as I conducted research for this project, I realized there is another group of people in the middle. These individuals have not been completely abused by their families, nor have they been completely loved by their parents. They find themselves in a state of limbo, caught between a bad and a good parent-child relationship. Although their parents clearly love them, they still struggle with negative emotions. This project aims to create a space for open dialogue about the subjective experiences of this group, helping both insiders and outsiders gain a deeper understanding of their culture. It’s important to note that we are not focusing on negative emotions, we are focusing on the process of epiphany that arises from childhood negative impacts. Through this project, we hope to shed light on how others may have similar epiphanies.

Sadien

Keywords: Embodiment Theory, Phenomenology, Ethnomethodology

Basically, It is a live installation among child memory, ghost and relationship. I was being invited to make a full album for her sound script… We did research in a group together.

Researches (Share mood-board)

Composition

Page 9 of the presentation below was the idea initially I had on making this experimental album. I had one week to finish the whole 20 minute album. And all the music should be tailored for the sound script. I thought the energy level was from dark ambient into experimental and sizzling, and then climax for a while to the end more polyphonic and realistic. Depended on both Sadien and my taste were not really drum fans, so we would more into ambient tones, to fit with the gothic surrealism… And it needed to think about would be how later dialogues would be put into, how we gonna make it quite clean, cause it would be spatialized anyway. Also I am not sure how contemporary actors would be carried with it… I think it would be good to have some melodies instead of being vague for all the parts, as sometimes it would be very worried for the actors. I imagined if later on the sound effects would be moving in the space like The angst of Sagazan, so I composed some music more like background immersions, while some more putting forward…